Human
by QT Roo
Summary: Jarod sends Miss Parker a gift


Written by M.A.G. ~ August 21,2000 ~ E-mail:Gypsyroo@aol.com  
Disclaimer: The Pretender is not mine; it belongs to MTM, evil NBC which canceled it, etc. Jarod belongs to Miss Parker and vice versa in my mind. The song Human is covered by the Pretenders, I don't own them;lyrics by Shelly Peiken and Mark Mcentee  
*Note: I've watched the Pretender from the very beginning (and have been a Jarod/Miss Parker shipper since) and have seen almost every episode, although I didn't get to see many from this past season. This is my first Pretender fic, excluding the little crossover Miss Parker made in my JAG fics Disclosure and Savior. I just heard the song again and it couldn't be more perfect and inspired this fic. Ironically, it is performed by the Pretenders (whose version is 10x better than the Divinyls'.)   
  
********  
  


Human  
(To my #1 fan in life, Shannon)  


  
  
Miss Parker's cell phone chimed to life, bringing her out of her reverie. What now? She hit the talk button. "What?" she snapped. She wore a short black skirt and black silk blouse, the color matching her dark mood.  
  
"Now now, is that anyway to talk to me after I sent you a package?"Jarod.  
  
Where the hell was he? What kind of game was he playing now?She flicked an irksome wisp of her raven hair behind her ear. She rested her cigarette in the ash tray, its smoke swirling around her desk.  
  
"Since when have you known me to be nice?"  
  
"The girl that gave me my first kiss was. You weren't always the way you are now. I know your secret, Parker." he said. Oh god, why did he have to remind her of that time when they were kids? She'd fallen in love with him then, the great Pretender. Both had changed. She was now the ice queen and he was someone else almost daily.  
  
"I didn't get any package." she said, placing the heel of her stiletto boot on the edge of the desk.  
  
"Patience, dear."  
  
"Jarod!" she yelled but it was too late, he already hung up.  
  
*********  
  
Sydney entered what served as her office while they stayed at the hotel awhile later. He held a parcel wrapped in good old untraceable plain brown paper in his hands.  
  
"For me Syd? You shouldn't have." she said sardonically.  
  
"I didn't. This was delivered outside. It looks like it's from Jarod. He's too smart to have stayed where he mailed it. He most likely forged the post mark. He can be anywhere now." He handed her the envelope and left.  
  
She tore open the packaging and found an unlabeled standard cassette tape one used to record on. It's tabs were broken off. There was no note, no explanation.  
  
She rushed over to the stereo on the opposite side of the room. Oh god, if Jarod could see me now, on my knees rushing to put the tape into the stereo, he would laugh. Get a grip, Parker, it's just a damn cassette tape! she told herself. But a cassette tape from Jarod. It can be a joke for all you know, Parker.  
  
Broots entered, shocked at the sight before him. She turned around. "What? Can't you see I'm busy? Get out!" He did as ordered. She pressed play and nothing happened. "Broots!" she screamed. "Get in here now!"  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"I can't get this stupid tape to play!"  
  
He came over to the stereo. "That's because its still set to CD. You have to hit the tape button." She swatted his outstretched forefinger away.  
  
"I knew that. I can do it myself." she said. She was in such a rush she'd overlooked that. He just stood there. She looked up at him. Getting the message her eyes burned into him, he left.   
  
She hit the button for tape and pressed play again. She stood up. For a few seconds, there was silence. Then the opening chords of a song began. It seemed familiar.  
  


  
_I play a good game  
But not as good as you  
I can be a little cold  
But you can be so cruel  
I'm not made of brick  
I'm not made of stone  
But I had you fooled enough to take me on  
If love was a war  
It's you who has won  
While I was confessing it  
You held your tongue  
Now the damage is done_  


  
  
It was her song. Jarod was one of few that knew the real Parker, the Parker that wasn't always so cold and calculated and uncaring. Only now she never reminded anyone of who she used to be. She wore her coat of armor, her intimidating protective sheath of witty and sarcastic, caustic insults, never revealing what was deep down inside. 'You weren't always the way you are now. I know your secret, Parker.' His words resonated in her head.  
  
  


_Well there's blood in these veins  
and I cry when in pain  
I'm only human on the inside  
And if looks could deceive  
Make it hard to believe  
I'm only human on the inside_  


  
  
She leaned against her desk and closed her eyes, listening to the rest of the song. "Thank you, Jarod." she whispered inaudibly.  


  
  
See I bleed and I bruise  
_Oh, but what's it to you  
I'm only human on the inside  
And if looks could deceive  
Make it hard to believe  
I'm only human on the inside  
I crash and I burn  
Maybe someday you'll learn  
I'm only human on the inside  
I stumble I fall  
Baby, under it all  
I'm only human on the inside.....  
_  


  
The volume of the song became lower and lower, signaling it was near its end. She heard the click of the tape player as it switched off. Her eyes flew open, revealing a grinning Jarod in front of her. She stood there wide mouthed. "How'd you get in here?" was all she managed to say. Stupid question, Parker, he's a genius.   
  
"Did you like the tape?" he asked.  
  
There was Jarod before her, in the flesh and she didn't know what to do. She turned towards the window behind the desk, sipping her drink. The amber liquid swirled in the glass; ice cubes softly rattled. One part of her knew she should call Sydney, Lyle and Broots to get their asses in there to capture him, while the other wanted to kiss him fiercely and push him down on the bed and.....Stop it Parker, it couldn't work if you wanted to. There's no use in fantasizing. "Thank you, Jarod." she said finally. She turned around once more to find him gone, the curtains of the window in the next room of the suite billowing in the breeze. She'd let him get away. She sighed, closing her eyes and taking another sip, the liqueur melting her metaphysical frozen core.  
  
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